For me, this part of winter isn’t just about staying warm, it’s about finding ways not to feel defeated by the gloom. What are you doing these days to help yourself stay vibrant inside?(Yes, yes, I know about the SAD lamps. WE ALL KNOW ABOUT THE LAMPS. Tell me about anything else. Please, I beg. LOL.)
It really helps me to take a walk sometime between 3-5 pm, although maybe 2 minutes and 8 seconds later every day? It helps not to be surprised by the darkness. If I'm home and I look up and the windows are black I feel ambushed, but if I'm out when it's happening, I enjoy the gloaming. I find that winter colors (sunsets, red berries on leafless bushes, violet hills) are just as pleasing as summer ones, you just have to look harder.
I buy myself flowers from Trader Joe’s every couple of weeks. I was bemoaning (to myself) why no one ever bought me flowers and, lo and behold, realized I could do it for myself 💕 small lesson big shift. I am also trying new recipes, rowing as often as possible (and getting to watch the sun rise) and lighting candles at dusk.
My wife and I have lots of small routines that feel like rituals. We wash our sheets on Sundays so we can do face masks in bed in fresh sheets. About once a week, I slow roast a chicken, then save the bones to make stock, then try out a new soup from the stock. We read a poem aloud each night before bed. Also, I try to always have a novel I'm reading. Once I finish one, I immediately start a new one. Reading keeps me off my phone, which always makes me feel less gloomy.
Listening to the Encanto soundtrack, swearing a lot, walking long distances in negative-degree weather in my new turquoise snowsuit (I said, "All I want for Christmas is a toddler snowsuit but for adults," and my mom came through big time), drinking hot cocoa with abandon, lighting candles at every meal. That's all I've got.
I am a fiction writer and I'm reading poetry again. Wakes me up like nothing else. Also, long baths in a big tub with a board thing to put over it for reading and writing in the water. Had a concussion early in the pandemic, so being able to read again is bringing me so much joy.
I’m one of the odd ones who love winter… I love walking by the lake (I live near Chicago). Any negative feelings, gloom or otherwise, gets swept away by the sound of crashing waves, the rougher the better…. A vicarious release of pent up feelings.
For me, I feel like sometimes these darker feelings need to be released in order for me to feel happier thoughts. Sometimes the lake meets me in my mood and helps me let go of things… I don’t know.
Looking at the vast lake fill me with wonder, still. Love the water…
Eating oysters. They're a seemingly perfect summer food that's actually better in the winter (eat them in months with an R!); they taste like sea spray and adventure; they're a project to pry open; they require bubbly; they're highly sustainable and good for the ocean!
My wife and I are watching more standup comedy and funny movies. Netflix has a standup show (see the Naomi Ekperigin one for sure). There's a great bunch of comedy on YouTube. There's a really funny movie we watched last night called Bad Words (I literally cried laughing at it). Just anything we think is funny. We watch after dinner so that the evenings are reserved for comedy and things that are upbeat.
Thank you for posting this question—like you (it seems), I need ideas! We got a Christmas tree earlier than usual this year because I wanted something spangly in the apartment, like RIGHT NOW. Now I feel disappointed every morning when I don’t see the tree in the living room. A thing that does help me is listening to ambient music (like Nils Frahm, for example) at night. It makes the darkness seem like I’m swimming underwater rather than merely submerged in winter.
I am buying byredo perfume samples, testing my sense of smell - trying to keep it sharp for the current reasons and also supporting the little perfume shop down the street, win win…and i’m also chipping away at learning italian and banjo. binge watching emily in paris to feel like i’m in paris even though i know it’s a bad show i don’t even care.
I just bought a bed frame (it's been too long), splurged on some colorful linen bedding, and some cute dinnerware to replace old ones. Seems like a lot of consumerism, I know. But it's the stuff I use and look at everyday and it just feels good.
Fuck SAD lamps. Candles everywhere. Candlelight dinner on the floor, right out of the takeout boxes, candles in the bathroom, surrounding the tub, JLO movies and vodka in the Haagen Dazs 👍🏻
I'm right there with you. I've been doing a walking meditation audio series each morning on living mindfully. I'm inside, in my slippers and warmest sweatpants, but my mind is happily engaged. So far, I feel a lot of benefit. Also reading Paulina Bren's recently published history, THE BARBIZON, THE HOTEL THAT SET WOMEN FREE and it is sparkling! Full of small stories that shaped lives in a big way.
Trying new things with friends like making candles together or a learning a new small skill. Just for fun, just for the sake of learning and spending time with people.
What has helped me with winter bleh and Sunday scaries is bake. I'm definitely no professional, but it's been fun trying new things! The structure of prepping, creating, and then having something to eat after is delightful. Was really into making bagels last year, this year I've been experimenting different ways to amp up Challah bread.
Last week, my husband and I got ramen, had a couple beers, and then watched My Dinner with Andre. We'd never seen it. It is such a weird beautiful movie.
I’m embracing softness. For me, that means warm food like soups and stews, ginger tea, hot baths, thiqq socks, sitting on my couch during the part of the afternoon when the sunlight streams in. Taking a daily (more so when I remember) photo of the same view outside my bedroom window to document passing time and changing of the seasons.
I started doing pottery — the hands-on nature of it, the focus required, and especially the practice of slowly working away at something I started out very bad at have been very nourishing. Now I save and sketch ideas and log my progress with photos.
Not sure I have any great solutions, but thank you for saying this about the SAD lamps! I mentioned to a friend about how winter was just beating me down and she kept saying “you gotta use that damn lamp.” Umm, one little lamp is not really gonna make January less of a bleak, desolate HELLSCAPE, JESSICA.
I’m one of the lucky ones dealing with long-haul covid (0/10 do not recommend), but it forced me to adapt to being at home because for a while I just couldn’t do a lot at that time. And somehow it’s…OK? Don’t get me wrong I’m an extrovert so is it always great no - but in a lot of ways some acceptance of “this is life right now, no one said it’s forever” has been peaceful.
One of my goals this year is to read lighter fare and more funny books, after reading too many sad stories last year. It’s a small doable shift to bring more levity to my life.
Step outside and breath non-inside air - even just three or four deep breaths. That air and my lungs have made it through this before - we can do it again.
Caveat - several of my friends call me by their nickname for me, "Nana" so I'll just start there. But knitting and listening to audiobooks, usually with a blanket and/or my dog in my lap has become an almost nightly ritual right now, and it's keeping me warm (literally and spiritually) during these dark times.
in the middle of winter i treat myself to a new sun dress & then hang it up where i can see it until it is warm enough to wear it outside.
searching for something cute, secondhand, and affordable is a fun task plus seeing a dress when i’m layered in thermals and knits reminds me that winter isn’t endless and that spring will come
Every day watching something grow. I planted some poppies from seed just for this. Watching the tiny little sprouts come up filled me with joy. Yet it's not the result that's popping out as important. It was the act of watching. The act of noticing that has me feeling more present in this body, in this time, in this life.
3ish years after obtaining a guitar I have actually started teaching myself guitar. My fingers hurt and I sound terrible but it's a lot of fun! In 9-12 months I'm sure I will be very skilled, or at least able to play Wonderwall.
Trying to stay upbeat, I will grab my bachi sticks and play taiko drums, or two wooden spoons / utensils and play on pots, or two chopsticks and drum on anything haha <3
My husband passed away (sorry I just cannot use the "d" word) 4 years ago today so it's kinda been a very long long time for me trying to stay vibrant inside. That said, I am finally able to read again as of about 5 months ago so I am enjoying that. And I take a break from all things "cyber" every so often. Turn off the internet connection. Turn off the phones. And just enjoy the unexpected spaciousness that seems to come from not feeling the need to respond to any beeps and rings. And a break from the news.
Lots of candles as soon as the sun goes down, lots of meditation and walks. But this afternoon I will try citrus peels and cinnamon -- that sounds like a wonderfully comforting thing to do.
Exercise - I know, ugh, but it really helps with the blahs and gives you a sense of accomplishment. The other is singing. Sounds silly but, for me, belting out a favorite tune (Barbra Streisand's live mash up of Where you lead/Sweet inspiration) and maybe shaking your booty a little can be a great mood elevator.
I hula hoop every day. It takes a few weeks to get the hang of it when you start but it's a joyous thing to do to music and even while you just watch a show
I'm taking this time to actually plan and design what I want my home to look and FEEL like. Not just buying whatever is on sale. I still like my deals now...but I either wait until something I truly want goes on sale or save up to buy it. I have no interior design skills, but it feels so much better when actual thought goes into it.
I don’t know how common they are but the arboretum in Seattle has a winter garden and it always lifts the endless gray of winter. The garden has winter blooming plants like hellebore and witch hazel, trees with colorful bark, plants that smell amazing, etc. Usually the hummingbirds and other birds are bopping around so it feels like a tiny oasis of spring.
For me, walking outside, even if it's just around the block. Going slow and noticing all the things my 5 senses are picking up. It's meditative and powerful.
Reading for the most part but also some form of exercise, taking a walk even if the weather is incredibly cold (this one takes a lot of pep talking to myself to make it happen), writing, telling my plants they’re beautiful, wearing a bright lipstick even if I’m staying indoors, taking extra time on my skincare routine, watching New York apartment tour videos on YouTube, going on social media to gas up my friends about their accomplishments, or just taking a nice nap. Whatever I can do to make myself happy gets me through.
2 minutes and 8 seconds. That's how much sunlight we gain every day after the winter solstice leading up to the longest day of the year.
2 minutes and 8 seconds.
I look out for the light, now that I know it's coming. It's like a little promise that will never not be, and I find that very comforting.
It really helps me to take a walk sometime between 3-5 pm, although maybe 2 minutes and 8 seconds later every day? It helps not to be surprised by the darkness. If I'm home and I look up and the windows are black I feel ambushed, but if I'm out when it's happening, I enjoy the gloaming. I find that winter colors (sunsets, red berries on leafless bushes, violet hills) are just as pleasing as summer ones, you just have to look harder.
I buy myself flowers from Trader Joe’s every couple of weeks. I was bemoaning (to myself) why no one ever bought me flowers and, lo and behold, realized I could do it for myself 💕 small lesson big shift. I am also trying new recipes, rowing as often as possible (and getting to watch the sun rise) and lighting candles at dusk.
Citrus fruits. I simmer the peels on the stove with some rosemary or cinnamon for good smells.
I am daydreaming about my summer garden and drawing/planning what to plant in the spring and summer. I want to be more vibrant!
My wife and I have lots of small routines that feel like rituals. We wash our sheets on Sundays so we can do face masks in bed in fresh sheets. About once a week, I slow roast a chicken, then save the bones to make stock, then try out a new soup from the stock. We read a poem aloud each night before bed. Also, I try to always have a novel I'm reading. Once I finish one, I immediately start a new one. Reading keeps me off my phone, which always makes me feel less gloomy.
Listening to the Encanto soundtrack, swearing a lot, walking long distances in negative-degree weather in my new turquoise snowsuit (I said, "All I want for Christmas is a toddler snowsuit but for adults," and my mom came through big time), drinking hot cocoa with abandon, lighting candles at every meal. That's all I've got.
I am a fiction writer and I'm reading poetry again. Wakes me up like nothing else. Also, long baths in a big tub with a board thing to put over it for reading and writing in the water. Had a concussion early in the pandemic, so being able to read again is bringing me so much joy.
I’m one of the odd ones who love winter… I love walking by the lake (I live near Chicago). Any negative feelings, gloom or otherwise, gets swept away by the sound of crashing waves, the rougher the better…. A vicarious release of pent up feelings.
For me, I feel like sometimes these darker feelings need to be released in order for me to feel happier thoughts. Sometimes the lake meets me in my mood and helps me let go of things… I don’t know.
Looking at the vast lake fill me with wonder, still. Love the water…
writing letters, making small zines and collages that I exchange with friends warm me up and brighten my day.
Candles really help me. And feeding the birds.
Eating oysters. They're a seemingly perfect summer food that's actually better in the winter (eat them in months with an R!); they taste like sea spray and adventure; they're a project to pry open; they require bubbly; they're highly sustainable and good for the ocean!
My wife and I are watching more standup comedy and funny movies. Netflix has a standup show (see the Naomi Ekperigin one for sure). There's a great bunch of comedy on YouTube. There's a really funny movie we watched last night called Bad Words (I literally cried laughing at it). Just anything we think is funny. We watch after dinner so that the evenings are reserved for comedy and things that are upbeat.
Thank you for posting this question—like you (it seems), I need ideas! We got a Christmas tree earlier than usual this year because I wanted something spangly in the apartment, like RIGHT NOW. Now I feel disappointed every morning when I don’t see the tree in the living room. A thing that does help me is listening to ambient music (like Nils Frahm, for example) at night. It makes the darkness seem like I’m swimming underwater rather than merely submerged in winter.
I am buying byredo perfume samples, testing my sense of smell - trying to keep it sharp for the current reasons and also supporting the little perfume shop down the street, win win…and i’m also chipping away at learning italian and banjo. binge watching emily in paris to feel like i’m in paris even though i know it’s a bad show i don’t even care.
I just bought a bed frame (it's been too long), splurged on some colorful linen bedding, and some cute dinnerware to replace old ones. Seems like a lot of consumerism, I know. But it's the stuff I use and look at everyday and it just feels good.
Hotttt, steam showers w/ essential oil shower sprays -- mini spa experience if you close your eyes hard enough.
Kind words spoken to someone, telling them just how much they mean to you.
Fuck SAD lamps. Candles everywhere. Candlelight dinner on the floor, right out of the takeout boxes, candles in the bathroom, surrounding the tub, JLO movies and vodka in the Haagen Dazs 👍🏻
I'm right there with you. I've been doing a walking meditation audio series each morning on living mindfully. I'm inside, in my slippers and warmest sweatpants, but my mind is happily engaged. So far, I feel a lot of benefit. Also reading Paulina Bren's recently published history, THE BARBIZON, THE HOTEL THAT SET WOMEN FREE and it is sparkling! Full of small stories that shaped lives in a big way.
Trying new things with friends like making candles together or a learning a new small skill. Just for fun, just for the sake of learning and spending time with people.
What has helped me with winter bleh and Sunday scaries is bake. I'm definitely no professional, but it's been fun trying new things! The structure of prepping, creating, and then having something to eat after is delightful. Was really into making bagels last year, this year I've been experimenting different ways to amp up Challah bread.
my morning routine includes yoga and piano and...it's a pretty vibrant start to the day WHEN I can get up early enough to get er done.
I just fully lean into being cozy at home with candles, knitting, and whatever takeout comfort food I feel like at the time.
Last week, my husband and I got ramen, had a couple beers, and then watched My Dinner with Andre. We'd never seen it. It is such a weird beautiful movie.
I’m embracing softness. For me, that means warm food like soups and stews, ginger tea, hot baths, thiqq socks, sitting on my couch during the part of the afternoon when the sunlight streams in. Taking a daily (more so when I remember) photo of the same view outside my bedroom window to document passing time and changing of the seasons.
I put nuts and seeds out for the squirrels on my deck just so I can be distracted by them later.
I started doing pottery — the hands-on nature of it, the focus required, and especially the practice of slowly working away at something I started out very bad at have been very nourishing. Now I save and sketch ideas and log my progress with photos.
Not sure I have any great solutions, but thank you for saying this about the SAD lamps! I mentioned to a friend about how winter was just beating me down and she kept saying “you gotta use that damn lamp.” Umm, one little lamp is not really gonna make January less of a bleak, desolate HELLSCAPE, JESSICA.
I’m one of the lucky ones dealing with long-haul covid (0/10 do not recommend), but it forced me to adapt to being at home because for a while I just couldn’t do a lot at that time. And somehow it’s…OK? Don’t get me wrong I’m an extrovert so is it always great no - but in a lot of ways some acceptance of “this is life right now, no one said it’s forever” has been peaceful.
One of my goals this year is to read lighter fare and more funny books, after reading too many sad stories last year. It’s a small doable shift to bring more levity to my life.
Step outside and breath non-inside air - even just three or four deep breaths. That air and my lungs have made it through this before - we can do it again.
Caveat - several of my friends call me by their nickname for me, "Nana" so I'll just start there. But knitting and listening to audiobooks, usually with a blanket and/or my dog in my lap has become an almost nightly ritual right now, and it's keeping me warm (literally and spiritually) during these dark times.
in the middle of winter i treat myself to a new sun dress & then hang it up where i can see it until it is warm enough to wear it outside.
searching for something cute, secondhand, and affordable is a fun task plus seeing a dress when i’m layered in thermals and knits reminds me that winter isn’t endless and that spring will come
Pickling veggies! So far I’ve done carrots (so many carrots), cauliflower, and radishes. Also romance novels.
Every day watching something grow. I planted some poppies from seed just for this. Watching the tiny little sprouts come up filled me with joy. Yet it's not the result that's popping out as important. It was the act of watching. The act of noticing that has me feeling more present in this body, in this time, in this life.
3ish years after obtaining a guitar I have actually started teaching myself guitar. My fingers hurt and I sound terrible but it's a lot of fun! In 9-12 months I'm sure I will be very skilled, or at least able to play Wonderwall.
reading fiction!
Trying to stay upbeat, I will grab my bachi sticks and play taiko drums, or two wooden spoons / utensils and play on pots, or two chopsticks and drum on anything haha <3
My husband passed away (sorry I just cannot use the "d" word) 4 years ago today so it's kinda been a very long long time for me trying to stay vibrant inside. That said, I am finally able to read again as of about 5 months ago so I am enjoying that. And I take a break from all things "cyber" every so often. Turn off the internet connection. Turn off the phones. And just enjoy the unexpected spaciousness that seems to come from not feeling the need to respond to any beeps and rings. And a break from the news.
Lots of candles as soon as the sun goes down, lots of meditation and walks. But this afternoon I will try citrus peels and cinnamon -- that sounds like a wonderfully comforting thing to do.
Exercise - I know, ugh, but it really helps with the blahs and gives you a sense of accomplishment. The other is singing. Sounds silly but, for me, belting out a favorite tune (Barbra Streisand's live mash up of Where you lead/Sweet inspiration) and maybe shaking your booty a little can be a great mood elevator.
I hula hoop every day. It takes a few weeks to get the hang of it when you start but it's a joyous thing to do to music and even while you just watch a show
piling a bunch of blankets on myself and watching golden girls. a lot of the episodes hold up great, and they are *incredibly* funny.
I'm taking this time to actually plan and design what I want my home to look and FEEL like. Not just buying whatever is on sale. I still like my deals now...but I either wait until something I truly want goes on sale or save up to buy it. I have no interior design skills, but it feels so much better when actual thought goes into it.
I don’t know how common they are but the arboretum in Seattle has a winter garden and it always lifts the endless gray of winter. The garden has winter blooming plants like hellebore and witch hazel, trees with colorful bark, plants that smell amazing, etc. Usually the hummingbirds and other birds are bopping around so it feels like a tiny oasis of spring.
planting some summer flowers under a grow light, just to see if they come up.
For me, walking outside, even if it's just around the block. Going slow and noticing all the things my 5 senses are picking up. It's meditative and powerful.
Reading for the most part but also some form of exercise, taking a walk even if the weather is incredibly cold (this one takes a lot of pep talking to myself to make it happen), writing, telling my plants they’re beautiful, wearing a bright lipstick even if I’m staying indoors, taking extra time on my skincare routine, watching New York apartment tour videos on YouTube, going on social media to gas up my friends about their accomplishments, or just taking a nice nap. Whatever I can do to make myself happy gets me through.
I've been taking long walks with my dog on the rail trail in the morning. Rarely see another person, and get to watch the season change day to day.
Reading approximately one romance novel per day. 😬