Your newsletter keeps lining up with what I'm talking to my therapist about! At some point in the pandemic--pretty early on, I think--I stopped imagining the future, let alone a joyful one. Today she gave me the homework of letting myself dream again. I'm a little nervous about it, but this helps. Thanks, Saeed!
Thank you, Saeed. I've been envisioning the exhausted, snotty nosed, wailing writing of my young adulthood. The pandemic has done that to me; it has robbed my brain of the memory of being a fully functioning rational 58 year old woman. To the outside world I probably look and act the same, but inside I swear I'm sixteen and isolated not because of a pandemic but because nobody likes me.
Wow, and just like that I have a better understanding of what I feel and why. That's the kind of "feel better" you are talking about, right? I feel a little braver about writing now, although dreaming feels out of reach.
Depression isn't a bitch like most people say it is; it's an old white guy who won't shut the fuck up. Thank you again for your generosity of time and ideas.
Saeed, you are so right. There is this terrible notion that continues to exist that artists have to suffer for their art in order for it to be good. I've come to realise that this is completely untrue and as an actor the best art I've made has been felt secure enough to explore challenging emotions and have the safe space ready for when I come out of them. Similar to your desire to write for the rest of your days I want to act for the rest of my days. None of us can do the things we care about if we pour everything we have into it and leave nothing left for the aftermath. Going to go write about that joyful future moment now. ❤️
Loved this newsletter <3 I also write about emotionally draining $hit, but like you, it's been a process to make the process itself sustainable and joy-adjacent (at the least), and for me, that comes in imagining a different future
Loved this newsletter <3 I also write about emotionally draining $hit, but like you, it's been a process to make the process itself sustainable and joy-adjacent (at the least), and for me, that comes in imagining a different future
This is a beautiful idea -- "letting joy you imagine and document pull you forward," but also actually writing it. I'm gonna try it.
Your newsletter keeps lining up with what I'm talking to my therapist about! At some point in the pandemic--pretty early on, I think--I stopped imagining the future, let alone a joyful one. Today she gave me the homework of letting myself dream again. I'm a little nervous about it, but this helps. Thanks, Saeed!
Thank you, Saeed. I've been envisioning the exhausted, snotty nosed, wailing writing of my young adulthood. The pandemic has done that to me; it has robbed my brain of the memory of being a fully functioning rational 58 year old woman. To the outside world I probably look and act the same, but inside I swear I'm sixteen and isolated not because of a pandemic but because nobody likes me.
Wow, and just like that I have a better understanding of what I feel and why. That's the kind of "feel better" you are talking about, right? I feel a little braver about writing now, although dreaming feels out of reach.
Depression isn't a bitch like most people say it is; it's an old white guy who won't shut the fuck up. Thank you again for your generosity of time and ideas.
Saeed, you are so right. There is this terrible notion that continues to exist that artists have to suffer for their art in order for it to be good. I've come to realise that this is completely untrue and as an actor the best art I've made has been felt secure enough to explore challenging emotions and have the safe space ready for when I come out of them. Similar to your desire to write for the rest of your days I want to act for the rest of my days. None of us can do the things we care about if we pour everything we have into it and leave nothing left for the aftermath. Going to go write about that joyful future moment now. ❤️
Loved this newsletter <3 I also write about emotionally draining $hit, but like you, it's been a process to make the process itself sustainable and joy-adjacent (at the least), and for me, that comes in imagining a different future
Loved this newsletter <3 I also write about emotionally draining $hit, but like you, it's been a process to make the process itself sustainable and joy-adjacent (at the least), and for me, that comes in imagining a different future